


A Robot, a Dragonborn, and an Orc Expertly Dodge Under a Bar

by one_true_houselight



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Gen, Team Sweet Flips, aro!Noelle, aro!johann, between crystal kingdom and 11th hour, pre-johavi, pre-taakitz fun, slight voidfish angst, training!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:41:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21961117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_true_houselight/pseuds/one_true_houselight
Summary: Team Sweet Flips trains while Magnus works on his rogue skills. Angus, Taako, and Avi help.
Relationships: Carey Fangbattle/Killian
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	A Robot, a Dragonborn, and an Orc Expertly Dodge Under a Bar

**Author's Note:**

> This was made as a gift for @mitraki on tumblr as part of Queer Taz Candlenights 2019! Thanks for reading!

NO-3113 focused in on the target standing ten feet across the room and ran through some basic coding. Since remembering her previous life, she had realized this habit was her robotic way of taking a few deep breaths before doing things; both were processes that normally went on in the background, but focusing on them helped ground her, in some strange way. 

Being a ghost in a robot body had a habit of making her more introspective, sometimes. 

She stepped back, just a little, before hurling herself forward, rolling neatly into a ball before exploding back upwards and delivering a round of precise kicks to the target. It shuddered before her final kick sent it flying backwards, its defeat scored by the cheers of Carey and Killian. 

“NO-3113, that was fantastic!” called Killian, jogging over to give her a fistbump. “You’re coming along so quickly, I remember that move taking me weeks.”

“Thanks,” NO-3113 said shyly. “I guess I just have really good teachers.” 

Carey socked her lightly on the arm. “Aw shucks, girl. You know flattery won’t get you out of cardio, right?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” NO-3113 said with a chuckle. 

Killian checked the clock on the wall before saying, “Though, before that, we should take a break.” Carey glanced up as well and nodded before making her way over to her bag, pulling out a piece of wood and a knife. 

“How’re your carpentry lessons with Magnus coming?” Killian asked, plopping down next to her girlfriend. 

“What do you think?” Carey held up the wood, and NO-3113 could tell it was almost segmented, with a higher, rounded portion at one end. Killian squinted at it as Carey brought it back to a level she could continue carving at. 

“Carey, I think that looks almost like...something.” Carey nudged Killian with her shoulder, who laughed before quickly adding, “Which I think is an accomplishment! I don’t think I could make a piece of wood look like something, you know?”

“Thanks, babe, your support means the world to me.” Even though her tone was sarcastic, Carey grinned at Killian before leaning over and kissing her on the cheek. “And this is loads better than what I started with, so I’m pleased, ya know?”

“My younger brother used to carve little things all the time,” said NO-3113, valvles in her shoulders whistling happily at the thought. “He made me a little cockatrice once, I was obsessed with them as a kid.”

“You’re kidding!”

“Oh yeah, I read every book I could get my hands on. I used to play this game where I’d stand really still and when people would ask what I was doing, I would say I got bit by a cockatrice and was petrified.” The two other reclaimers laughed as NO-3113 added, “That joke got less funny to my parents when I tried to use it to get out of chores.”

It was a little weird sometimes, talking about her life before waking up in a metal body. But it felt nice too, as if there wasn’t a gnawing divide between the two parts of her life. The fact that her friends rolled with it too was just icing on the cake. 

As Carey continued carving and the three continued to idly chat, NO-3113 heard familiar footsteps coming towards the doorway of the gym. Sure enough, Magnus charged in and triumphantly dropped a green, grey, white, and black striped scarf in front of Carey. 

Carey stared at it for a second before looking up. “What’s this?”

“You sent me to take something from someone’s bag without them knowing. I got this from Avi!” 

Carey’s eyes lit up. “Oh, sweet! Good job Mags. What was your approach?” 

“Well, I went up to him and started talking about the secret assignment he’s been doing for the Director…” As part of Magnus’ rogue training, Carey had made up a scavenger hunt of sneaky activities for Magnus to complete (with permission from other base residents, of course). Thus far he had picked Taako’s lock (and found the elf himself inside, stone faced as he shot sparks into the air), followed Merle around for ten straight minutes (and then jumped out and scared him; Merle had yelled ‘I’M FUCKING READY MAGNUS STOP’, to Magnus’ confusion), and now had this scarf of Avi’s. 

Once Magnus finished his explanation (fidgeting the whole time, naturally), Carey nodded thoughtfully. “Nice technique, getting a mark to be distracted by seemingly ‘forbidden info’. Now, before I send you on your next task, I need to check that my associate is ready.” She pulled out her Stone of Far Speech and pressed a few buttons. “Agent Holmes, are you ready for Magnus?”

NO-3113 was confused for a second, not recognizing the name. But then, the Stone crackled. “Uh, yeah, definitely, for sure. This is Agent Holmes, which is my name, and I am ready in the agreed upon rendezvous point.” It sounded as if Angus McDonald was talking through a pencil stuck between his teeth. 

Magnus nodded sagely, clearly fighting off a grin. “Alright, I’ll meet, uh, _Agent Holmes_. Where am I going?” 

“Cafeteria. He’ll explain your assignment once you get there.”

“Great,” cheered Magnus, bouncing towards the door. “Tell him I need to grab my scarf, and I’ll be right over.” Carey gave him a thumbs up as he disappeared through the doorway. 

She relayed the information, and the Stone crackled again, this time with a non-altered Angus’ voice. “Ok. Was that ok? I tried to disguise my voice, I don’t know if it worked. I read this trick about putting a pencil in your mouth, and I wanted to try it, because I’m an agent today and all.”

“You were great, Ango,” called Killian. 

“Yeah, I was swept away by the gravitas,” said NO-3113. 

“Oh good! Thank you, ma’ams!” Carey smiled as the channel crackled off, then pressed a few more buttons. 

“Hey Avi,” she said, stretching her neck. “You got got by Mags, want to come pick up your item?”

“Aw shit, is that why he was pestering me about my top secret mission?”

Carey grinned. “I’m afraid so, my dude.” 

Some muffled cursing came over the line before Avi muttered, “I’ll be by in a few. Man, you’re teaching Magnus well, aren’t ya?”

“Of course she is, ya goof,” said Killian, wrapping an arm around Carey. Small frills around Carey’s neck rose a little in embarrassment, but she grinned at Killian all the same. 

The stone crackled off again. Carey tucked it away and went back to her carving. She gestured at the scarf with her knife, asking, “I’ve never seen Avi wear this, wonder if it’s new?”

Killian shrugged. “It’s a pretty color scheme.”

NO-3113, upon hearing that, realized she recognized the color scheme. “It’s the aromantic flag.”

“Oh, I think you’re right!” Carey nodded, staring off into the middle distance. “I think I’ve seen Johann with a pin-oh my god, this is probably a present for Johann!”

“That’s the best!” Killian sighed. “I need to learn the flags better, honestly.” 

NO-3113 shrugged. “Same. I just remember that one because I had a little flag back home.” 

Killian and Carey looked up in surprise. “I didn’t know you were aro, NO-3113.”

“It just never came up, I guess.” NO-3113 felt her fans running a little faster. She had only just started coming out before her death, and it had kind of fallen to the wayside after her robotic awakening. It was all still new, in the grand scheme of things. 

“Well,” Carey said, leaning forward, clearly used to this speech. “The moon base is super accepting, as you’ve hopefully noticed. Garfield will order any pride stuff you want up here, and we have a Queer meetup every month!”

“The next one’s next week,” Killian chimed in. Carey nodded enthusiastically. “If you’re comfortable with it, of course.”

“Yeah, I think that’d be great. Thanks.” NO-3113 looked down, fans still whirring in the excitement. She saw where Killian and Carey has put gold star stickers on her torso, and had a thought. “Hey, I could probably get a pretty rad aro sticker.”

“Hell yeah!” As Carey cheered, Avi came in, his normal grin on his face. 

“I hear an item of mine has been recovered?” Carey held up the scarf. Avi suddenly blushed, quickly saying, “Oh, I’m glad I’m getting it back now, I need it in like, twenty minutes.”

“It’s for Johann, right?” 

Avi blushed deeper. “Yeah, he was saying he hadn’t had a chance recently to get any pride stuff, so I figured…”

Killian stood up and patted Avi on the shoulder. “That’s so sweet, I’m sure he’ll love it.” Avi grinned appreciatively. 

“Was it hard finding aro stuff?” Asked NO-3113. “I’m gonna try and get some stuff soon.”

“Nope! Garfield has a pretty complete catalog.” Avi bounced a little. “If you’re comfortable with it, you should tell Johann you’re aro too, he’ll appreciate the company.”

“For sure, yeah! I’m planning on going to the meetup next week.”

“Radical!” Avi took the scarf and wrapped it up. “Well ladies, I best be off. Places to see, things to do-“

“Scarves to give,” said Killian with a grin. Avi made finger guns at her before walking out with a final wave. 

Once Avi had left, Carey, Killian, and NO-3113 stood back up to get back to training. Before they could, however, they heard Magnus walking down the hallway. NO-3113’s back was to the door, but she spun when Carey’s eyes widened at its occupant. 

Magnus was leaning on the doorway, clothes ripped. He seemed to be smoking slightly as well, but he had a wild grin on his face as he held up a scroll, which appeared to be miraculously undamaged. 

“Magnus, are you good?” Asked Killian. 

“Yeah! That was the best challenge yet!” As Magnus chattered enthusiastically, Angus slipped into the room, a slightly sheepish grin on his face. 

Carey turned to the small boy with a grin. “How was the mission, Agent Holmes?”

Angus straightened up a little. “Um, well…” He scrunched his eyebrows together before saying in a low voice, “Ma’am, I don’t have my pencil for my voice.” 

“You don’t need it, kiddo. You don’t need the cover anymore.”

“Oh, ok! Well, I prepared a few spells, with the help of Agent, um, Umbrella-“

At that point, Taako pokes his head into the door. “Agent _Umbrella_?”

“I was under pressure!”

Taako grinned and mussed with Angus’ hair. “I’m messing with ya, Ang- Sorry, Agent Holmes. Proceed with your report.”

Angus nodded and continued, “The subject was surprised by the addition of magical elements, and stepped right into the fire bolt trap, but adapted quickly and, as you can see, procured the scroll.”

Carey nodded. “Very good, Agent Holmes. Now, Magnus,” she said, turning to her student. “What have we learned from this exercise?”

“How to avoid being set on fire!” Before Carey could respond, he quickly added, “And, probably more importantly, to never assume you know what you’re stepping into.”

“Very good,” Carey said approvingly. “Alright, I think we can be done for the day. Nice scarf, by the way.” NO-3113, who had been distracted by the smoke coiling from his hair, finally noticed the trans pride scarf around his neck. 

“Oh thanks! Someone made it for me a while ago, and it’s still going strong.” A shadow passed over his face. “I think it’s a matching set, actually, I just can’t remember who…” At that point, Taako got a similar look, and NO-3113 remembered Carey and Killian telling her in a low voice her first day here that these two, along with Merle, had strange moments like this, and that the best thing they found to do was let them work through it, then continue the conversation when they were ready. 

It was only a few moments later that Magnus and Taako shook themselves out of whatever had taken hold of their minds. “But yeah, I’m all about pride scarves! They keep me warm, and they have rad colors!” 

“Yeah,” Carey responded, easily sliding past the lapse. “Avi’s getting an aro one for Johann.”

“Oh, those two are adorable,” sighed Taako. “Are they together, or still dancing?”

“Still dancing,” said Killian. 

“Speaking of adorable,” Magnus said in a teasing tone. “That Kravitz seemed to-“

Taako looked down, fidgeting with seam of his coat. “Oh you know, fighting like that just, you know, the tension, the mystery-“

“The accent.” Taako summoned Mage Hand and shoved Killian, who cackled. “Ok, ok, I’ll stop, sorry Taako.”

“It’s fine,” mumbled Taako. “It’s just been a while, I guess.” 

Magnus, who has been grinning at the banter, suddenly got a look of consternation on his face. “Wait, Angus said you helped him, Taako?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Why were you setting me on fire?”

Taako scoffed. “Oh, so it’s ok when the ten year old does it, but when I do it-“

“We’re teammates, don’t you want me ready-“

“Hey, I just want to make sure you’re properly trained!” Magnus threw up his hands at that, and the others in the room were chuckling. Taako shrugged. “Besides, I trust Angus. He wouldn’t have let you get hurt.”

Angus beamed. “Thank you, sir!” 

“Alright, alright,” said Killian, looking at the clock. “We’ve gotta get back to training, so unless you want to do some pushups, we’ll see you later.”

“Absolutely not,” said Taako, backing towards the door. “Come on, Angus, you have to tell me about your magics.”

“Bye! See you all later!” Angus called with a wave, following Taako out the door. 

Magnus looked at Carey. “Am I good?”

“Yeah! Good work today, I might stop by later to do carving stuff.” Magnus gave her a thumbs up, gave a salute to Killian and NO-3113, and walked out. 

NO-3113 watched the door for a little bit, basking in the happiness of all her new friends. She jumped a little when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Killian was standing next to her, head cocked. “What’s the goofy grin for?”

“I’m just happy I get a chance to have this life, to know all of you.” NO-3113 looked away, but not before seeing Killian and Carey exchange a pleased look. 

“We’re glad we get to know you too, NO-3113.” Without warning, Carey stepped forward and hugged her, Killian joining in a moment later. NO-3113 hugger back, careful not to crush her friends. 

Carey looked around at the three of them before throwing her head back and whooping, “Team Sweet Flips forever!” Killian and NO-3113 cheered too, and then they went back to training, their movements and their hearts ever more in sync.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks! Please leave kudos and comments if you are so inclined. Come find me @one-true-houselight on tumblr!


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